Her expression eases into something soft. I want Drew. About anything.

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Age: 23

That girl who could flirt with a handsome man and set him to scoring through four condoms. I was free and I was easy and I was sexual and I was desirable and I was funny and I was worth something. Instantly, he moved. Not letting go of my wrists but shifting them down so my elbows were bent, the position more comfortable, at the same time taking his weight out of his hands and also miraculously some of it off me. He finally lifted his head and I liked that the harshness of sex was gone, the laziness of satisfaction had taken its place, but he still had an expression of concern. After that, he slid out, let go of my wrists, disengaged, and with no further ado, got off me, out of the bed and walked naked toward the hall.

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In fact, my mom was that kind of girl. I was too shy. To be honest, I was also a hint of a prude.

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Mom has the grace to flush, and I know it will be bad.

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Luckily, the relationships ended before then. She shifts in her seat, and my heart plummets.

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God, please not the marriage thing. The words set off a bomb within my skull.

I just sit there, my brain scrambled, leaving me unable to speak. You rent.

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Then take a deep breath. Her eyes turn sad, regretful.

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Mom jumps up then. In truth, I ought to have left long ago. I know the drill.

Hurt, anger, and disgust is an ugly cocktail in my veins. Well, I think wryly, I wanted a reminder, and I sure as hell got one. Nothing is going to change the situation. Which only makes my agitation burn stronger. The beautiful fall day is totally incongruent with my mood.

The hook up

Fluffy clouds bump around in a blue sky. The air is just this shade of cool, and the sun shines hot on my head as I walk across the campus parking lot, leaving my Vespa behind. The stadium looms read me, and my heartbeat picks up. The closer I get, the easier it is to hear the sounds online play, the errant trill of a whistle, and the grunts and thuds of young men throwing themselves against each hook or those padded training contraptions, the name of which I cannot recall.

Scattered about the stadium seats like birds alighting for feed are people watching the football team practice. He crane forward to watch Drew throw a pass. The player laughs and jogs lightly back to Drew, tossing him the ball before one of the coaches makes a comment to both of them.

The hookup (moonlight and motor oil #1)(2)

Sitting a few feet from a couple of younger guys who wax on about the awesomeness that is Battle Baylor, I feel anonymous. The sun has slipped behind the line of the stadium, and my spot falls to shadows. A relief from the heat. Drew makes a few more throws, each one farther, each in a different direction, different approach. And every time he throws, a swath of tawny skin shows along the bottom of his jersey.

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Something that makes all my happy places clench sweetly. - [ protected].

Hardly old. I place my hands in my lap.

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